A Beautiful Baby Boy
Chris had come into the world as a big, handsome baby, and we were both proud of him. Once he shed his newborn looks it became clear he was a good mix of both of us. In fact, he favored my Mercie's looks more than mine, which was a good thing. Once he shed his newborn baby hair, he sprouted soft curls of light brown hair with blond highlights. His eyes were brown and his visage soft, and serene. Within 40 days we had him baptized at Rapid City's Catholic Cathedral.
"Bodacious blond effrontery" I called it. These genes traveled down either my Mom's or Mercie's Dad's side. Titi Gloria, in fact, had been born blond. But in general, blond people were very uncommon on either side of our families. This contributed to Chris's looks. He was nice to look at and oh so gentle, like my Mercie. As Chris grew up his hair turned brown.
Mom Reached Out
Surprising everyone but me for sure, Mom got married in September 1986 to a cousin of ours named Israel. She went to live with him to Hollywood, Florida. My little Brother went along with them. Titi Gloria moved back in.
Now Mom and I had not spoken since I left home in 1984. But soon after Chris was born, I got a phone call. Israel was calling. He inquired if I could talk to Mom. I said "yes." She was very guarded and dry, but the moment marked a thaw in our relationship. It became obvious to Mercie and I that Mom wanted to be a part of her first grandson’s life. That was fine by me. Chris’s arrival served to reconnect us if not reconcile us. It was a good first step.
Our mutual communications reached a new normal. This new plateau of "normality" in our relationship would last until 2022. That's because, left unmanaged, narcissism only worsens with age. I'm sad to say that's where she's now.
But I digress.
I've wondered what would've happened had Mom assented to Israel's romantic overtures earlier. In fact, I remember he'd being around before, but Mom had rebuffed him. Had Mom not done so it would've been unlikely I would've met my Mercie. Our boys wouldn't been born., nor our grandchildren. This proved to me that God's Providence often acts through other people's hesitations. I thank the Lord for his unending Providence toward us.
Military and Civilian Education Proceeds Unfettered
Things were looking up. In 1987 the Air Force promoted me to E-4/Senior Airman and I got to attend the NCO Preparatory School on base the following year. It was heavy on presentations and public speaking. Back then we would type our slide and then transfer the text to real transparent slides. I spent two weeks in the school, had lots of fun, and had no trouble passing it. I found I thrived in any academic environment.
Same thing with civilian schoolwork. I breezed through Calculus I and II which prepared me for the two initial Physics courses later in 1988. I would take my calculus homework to the field, stamping an unusual image among my peers. I did my homework on the missile sites while keeping my eyes peeled for intrusive cattle.
Travel to Puerto Rico
Our families were anxious to see Chris and thus we did our first return trip in the summer of '87. The reception was exceptional as befitted the circumstances. Everyone looked forward to seeing Chris, and us. Mom wasn't present because, as I've said, she was stateside.
The most important thing that took place during our visit was my Covenant of Love with Our Lady. I reached out to Fr. Esters and had Chris offered to our Lady in Fr. Ester's home shrine. Later on, I composed a covenant prayer and pledge that I recited at the site of the new Schoenstatt shrine in Juana Díaz. There was only a marker on the place where the new shrine was to be built.
That was the place we chose for my Covenant, offered as a "spiritual building stone" for the new Shrine. That day I asked for blessings over Mercie and Chris. I promised to defend Mary's own honor against any attacker. I also promised to pursue my personal ideal or "mission statement" which was:
To ascertain and follow God's will in my life until the end, so that I could become another Christ and a pillar of the Church.
Yes, mine was an ambitious statement. I've been more successful on the first part. The second two aspirations, well, they remain aspirations still. Becoming "another Christ" is mandatory to enter God's presence in eternity. It must happen before I enter God's presence. But the last aspiration, becoming "a pillar of the Church," I doubt that's going to happen. Becoming “a pillar of the Church” was just a flash of youthful bravado, not in the Father’s will for me. As I see it now, my pursuit of holiness is leading me into silence and obscurity. I like what Saint Rafael Arnaíz Barón, a Spanish Trappist lay brother, used to say: I want to be a saint without anyone finding out. I've been sensing for a while that's going to be my own way too. As I've written elsewhere:
I begin to see but barely,
That I'm to be a candle
Meant to shine faintly into the Night
Availing others but weakly
Slowly consuming its life
Until the flame embraces the Darkness
And then begins to burn bright.
Again.
Forever.
Elsewhere.
Into the Father’s Light.
Flight Home
We completed our journey and returned to South Dakota via Chicago. Chris cried the entire flight between Chicago and Rapid City because he was teething. I had to stand aft of the place with him an attempt to quiet him down. A stewardess suggested I put some droplets of whiskey on one finger and smeared Chris's gums with it. I would call that now a "Southern solution" but at the time, we agreed.
Chris did calm down. Asleep and possibly drunk, Chris was quiet for the rest of the flight home to South Dakota.